I don't even know where to begin with this one..

Maybe I'm the one out in the dark... The outcast of some sort. To me, it appears that the society is sooo shitty that its really starting to aggravate me. Sense when has drugs been the cool thing? I though drugs were for the hippies back in the day; when I was a child. Or when my parents were kids going through school.

I always though, because of my shyness, that its the reason for going threw school with a few friends.
Today I realized I can be outgoing in public places. I believe the reason for going threw school with a few friends is because of everyone stupidity.. I shouldn't say everyone, but most of the kids in my school were complete fuck ups. I thought of the athletic, jock, of being healthy. Not thinking they were into the drugs, and staying up all night partying and getting shit faced. Along with the smarter kids.. the ones going of to college, the ones you looked up to because of there intelligence..

I'm a very easy going kid. I normally have the mind set of 'Im doing what I want, you do what you want'. I can get a long with just about anyone. But when some one makes it seem like there the shit because they are doing coke really aggravates me.

All of the kids I used to look up to because they were popular, smart, good at sports, or just seemed to be cool people ended up fucking there life over.. At the age of 19...20? Sitting in jail at 19, 20, or even 21 for doing the drugs, braking into people's car and stealing things..

I just don't get it. Soooo many people have lost my respect because they feel the need to do drugs to be cool..

Don't get me wrong, if your going to do drugs or drink or whatever.. just do it for yourself, not cause its 'cool'. I do have friends who drink, do the drugs. But they do it for them self. Not for me.. not for you, but because its what they want to do.

I'm going to be 21 in a few months.. I have been doing a lot of thinking of going out to have a good time, to enjoy myself, to be social, the reason I would start to drink. It seems like all of the people around my age who start to do that go no where with there life. Yes, I may not be attending a college. It may not seem like my life is going anywhere either, but I'm enjoying my life worry free. Enjoying what I have, what I can do, what I can work hard for.